It's proven isn't it?
Nothing but the ugly truth.

I have nowhere to vent my frustrations.
Seems like lady luck is always not by my side.
Where is my fairytale?
Seems like i really have to stay alone for the rest of my life just like how my gut feeling keeps telling me.
Why is it that the guys that i like always don't reciprocate.
And why is it that all the guys that like me, i don't reciprocate?
Some of my friends asked if I'm too pickyy or my expectations are too high.
Maybe i am.
But who wouldn't want to choose wisely.
Commitment is something i really treasure and respect.
I'm definitely not into flinging at all.
Initially, there was Lankky.
But I'm just so disappointed in him.
And now D. is somehow texting my friend.
I'm definitely backing out.
I shall not be looking forward to see him.
Shall not even be tempted to add him on Facebook.
Yes.
I have decided to just be normal and be on my own.
No more thoughts of D.
No more wishful thinking.
No more.
Dont even think of it Beth.

I'm so counting down to Zoukout tmr!
Hope its gonna be fun!
Hehe.
And I'm on leave til Monday.
Wheeee!
Party, party and party.
That's what I love the most isn't it?
HAHA.

I'm gonna meet my primary school friends for dinner on Monday!
OMFG.
Haven't been seeing them for decades.
Hopefully awkwardness don't come crawling towards us.
I'll try to make conversations of course!
I always try to talk to people.
I break the ice and I'm friendly.
HAHAHA.
Crapppy.
Hope it turns out well.
It will!
:D

*****

I have been talking to Lanky recently.
*BEAMS*
:DDD
I'm contented.

Ohh noo.
It's been ages since I updated my blog again.
I've been busy workinggg.
Off days are just for me to rest my aching legs, body and soul.
Partying days are limited.
Meet ups with friends are just based on my hectic schedule.
My life seems so screwed!
Well, what can i say?
I'm a nurse.
Caring for patients is my job.
So, no complaints.
And since the day i chose this profession,
I would have already expected all these coming.
=_=

I need a holiday badly.
Hope Daddy is planning a holiday destination soon.
I loveee travelling! Hehe.


*****

Zoukout is this coming Saturday.
I can't wait!
Partyyy!
:DDD
HAHAHA.
And all my Aussie mates are backk.
Woots.
Can't wait to see them.
I'm so gonna cam-whore.
Promise I would update my blog with pics.
As in regularly.
HAHA.

*****

On a side note,
Lankyy received my present already.
Phew. Luckily the mail didn't get lost or something.
Singapore post is very efficient indeed!
Speed post is just 3days.
Heeee.
And Lanky loves it!
Yayness!
I wonder what's his expression like?
But he seems really grateful.
I'm so happy and proud of myself.
Especially the card.
*A pat on my shoulder*
HAHA.
Can't wait for April next year.
Til then! :D

I haven't been blogging for the longest time!
But I will try to keep my blog updated as much as possible.
Well well, been really busy working.
So much so that I don't even have time for myself sometimes.
But I'm getting used to working.
Surprisingly, I'm sorta like loving my job as days goes by.
I hope the passion stays til the day my bond ends.
If not I'm gonna be so miserable!
Haha.
Ohh and I'm going to Bangkok with Baby Gus & Jer in January!
Wheeee!!!
I can't wait man.
We are so gonna have fun. Loads of it! Hehe.
And Saturday is Halloween!
Bestie wants to dress up.
Should I dress up as Marilyn Monroe?! Fairy?!
Or ghost?!
OMG, I'm so gonna take photos.
Many many photos.
I'm getting excitedddd, I can't contain it.
HAHA.
I'm Crazy.

*****
And i got a pleasant surprise today!
Though it wasn't really something big, this lil surprise just simply made my day.
I'm so gonna be smiling for at least a month.
:DDD

I'm sleeping soon.
Promise to update my blog regularly.
Ta! :))

Lianie told me she is going to Taiwan tomorrow.
Hearing that,
I realised that I'm missing Taiwan many many.
I'm not sure when is the next time I will go back there.
Hopefully soon.
:)

Pardon me for using vulgarities in this entry.
But I just want to rant in here.
Work is so torturous.
I'm sad enough that i didn't get into A&E.
And for those who do not know, I actually got into Plastic Surgery & Eye ward.
Sounds interesting and cool right?!
It is! And I love the job scope there.
But the working environment sucks to the max!
And I thought that it shouldn't be difficult to blend into the ward.
I'm so wrong.
SO WRONG.
The fact that I'm new and the only one in the batch of August to get into this particular ward just makes things worst.
I'm like totally on my own.
Furthermore, I know nuts about PLASTIC SURGERY/EYE.
And when I tried to ask for help in something,
the staff there are hostile and FUCKING unfriendly!

Ward sister: "Everyone, we have a new staff today, she just came back from Australia, she is a degree holder."
Nurse 1: "wahh u already got ur degree, we only diploma lehh. You're so much more senior than us leh."
Nurse 2: " Yahh lahh, degree lehh, we want to take also cannot loh."

Every single shit also associate with my degree.
LIKE WHAT THE FUCK!
I personally don't think that having a degree is any greater.
My pay is only a pathetic $100 more.
My designation is still the same as them- staff nurse 1.
DAMMIT!
Seriously, if they want to be so sulky about it then jolly well go ahead and take the course.
Who is bloody stopping them man.
Freakingg pissed off sometimes.
Each time I try to brace myself up thinking that things will get better each day,
they never fail to disappoint me.
I ended up losing confidence towards this ward.
The more I dread going to work.
I even thought of transferring ward but that's like so LOSER isn't it?
I don't want to be a LOSER!
Well, I just hope for the better.
I really do hope and I'm trying to convince myself.
I'm hopeful!

Started work for a week already.
Can't believe I'm officially a nurse.
Mixed feelings within me.
But, I'm sure i will be able to pull through!
:)
And tomorrow I'm gonna know which department I'm in.
Hopefully i will be able to get into A&E!
I'm being very very very hopeful.
But omg, what if i dun get into A&E?
No no no.
I don't want to think about it. HAHA.
Okay, time to hit the sacks.
Nitez peeps!

P.S I'm exciteddd cos I'm meeting Pris and Gus tmr! :DDD

I'm freakinggg sick and lethargic.
I'm so dying.

I just came back from Bangkok.
A fruitful yet tiring trip though.
Very happy to be able to see my family and friends there.
Had loads of fun.
And thankfully, my dearest grandpa is fine now.
He is on medications.
It will probably take awhile to recover but at least he is stable.
:DDD
And I realised that my blog has been really boring.
The lack of photos maybe?
HAHA.
I haven't even posted anything about Taiwan yet.
Feeling really lazy.
Furthermore, I feel really ugly now seriously.
The weight gain causing my round face, fat arms, fat thighs, everywhere round
like SERIOUSLY!
Plus my very poor skin condition now.
I ought or rather NEED to do something about it.
Before I really kill myself.
And I think I'm on the verge of doing that already.


*****

Ohh, and I have decided.
I want to go Thailand and study Thai language like properly.
To be able to write and read.
I might be able to have a career switch in the later part of my life.
Not that the language school in Singapore is not good.
But I just feel like experiencing being a full-fledged Thai for a period of time.
I want to stay there for a year or something!
Sounds like a crazy idea, but I'm serious!
I'm so planning for it now.
Xueyi is so right.
I can't seem to stay in Singapore for long.
HAHAHA.
Well well, I loveee travelling!
HEHEHE.
:DDD
Man and I'm gonna start working like next monday!
Dreading it.
Hope I get into one of my 3 choices.
My 1st choice is A&E.
2nd choice is Burns unit.
3rd choice is Day surgery.
The best thing would be to get into the day surgery department man.
5 days work week!
HAHAHA.
Pray for me pleaseeeee.


*****

On a heavier note,
I have been feeling really emo and lifeless.
Sighs.
My mind is constantly thinking of many many things.
Friendships especially.
Sometimes I wonder why things turned out this way.
Maybe I could have done something to prevent all this from happening?
Or rather I could have handled the situation better there and then?
I cant help but feeling sad and yet I really dont know how to start getting the friendships back.
I'm afraid of rejection and the akwardness.
Really afraid.
She is one of my bestest girlfriend.
The endless conversations and nonsensical stuff we do together.
From online shopping --> endless eating --> school --> malaysia --> travelling together right up to studying in Australia together.
Everything.
I do miss it.
He is my buddy.
He never fail to cheer me up.
The endless stuff we talked about.
The 3 tier muffins on my 21st Birthday especially.
And he never fail to make me sing Sing Star over and over again.
All these sweet memories that will stay in my heart forever.
I don't know when will we be like last time again.
Or maybe it's impossible.
All I want to say is I really treasure the times we spent together.
And I really miss you both.
Thanks Shanel. Thanks David.

I'm blogging in my hotel room in Bangkok now.
Walked around Suan Lum Night Bazzar just now.
Loving it.
:)
Though I have been here umpteen times, I never ever once got sick of it.
I feel very relaxed.
And most importantly very very happy.
I don't know why.
Maybe this place feels like home.
And this trip is not only a short getaway, but also a trip to visit my dearest grandpa.
He is very very sick now.
His intestine ruptured due to the excessive intake of alcohol.
The 1st operation was a success and he is in the midst of waiting for the 2ND one.
I hope he will get well soon.
I love him and I can't imagine losing him.
So I pray really hard.
Please my dear Buddha, please bless my grandpa.
:)

*****
And I hope you forget me not.

I'm waiting with patience.

I hate my intuition.
It's always there telling me what would happen next.
Telling me all the bad things.
The disappointment. The sadness.
I really hate it.
Cos it never fails to make me upset.
It never fails to make me cry.

I'm back.
I Loveee Taiwan many many!
1 week is too short.
I want to go again.
Wheeeeeee.
:DDD

I'm Backkk in Singapore!
:DDD
The weather is super duper hot.
Gosh.
Almost died of heat stroke man.
And the thing is I seldom complain about the weather being hot.
It must be so damn hot for me to say that!
HAHA.
Convocation was good!
I will blog about it soon.
Cos I'm leaving for Taiwan in a few hours time!
Wheeeeeee.
Will update when I'm back next week!
:DDD

My long awaited Graduation Ceremony.

Convocation is today!
I'm getting my certificate today.
I'm wearing my graduation gown today.
I'm so gonna throw my hat whatever that is call, up in the air!
So exciteeedddd!
:DDD

P.S But I wish Daddy is here with me to celebrate :(

Its been a long time since I last blog.

And I'm so suppose to update about my Sydney trip!
Oh my.
Getting very lazy updating all the nitty gritties of my life.
How am I going to maintain my blog when I go back to Singapore like seriously?!
Been bumming around doing nothing much.
Besides sleeping, eating, partying, playing Internet and having fun.
I'm a couch potato now!
I don't wantttt!
:(
My life is just revolving around all these activities over and over again.
What the hell am I doing?
I'm so turning into an Aussie now.
I don't wanttt!
:(((
Luckily in 3 days time, I'm returning back to Singapore.
Yaynesss!
I'm seeing Bestie and Baby..
I will get to eat all my local food all over again.
Can't wait!
Sadness.
Don't really wish to say anymore.
Some things are better left unsaid.

*****
Here are some pics of my 5 day Sydney trip!
I officially declare that I loveeee Sydney many many!
I don't mind migrating there.
:DDD
The 1st thing we touched down in Sydney was to fill up our tummy,
so we headed to the East Ocean Chinese restaurant at Chinatown to eat Dim Sum!
The Dim Sum was fantastic.
So much better than Singapore.
We had Dim Sum twice during our trip.
Freakingggg Yummylicious!
Look at all our happy faces.
HAHA.



Shopping at the City is a must.
The shopping there is O.M.G
Lots of variety and many many brands.
Too many!
We walked til our legs ached.

Our main aim to Sydney was to attend Jay Chou's Concert!
We are so exciteddd can.
Thousands and thousands of people attended his concert.
It was jammed-packed!
But it wasn't really as good as I thought it would be.
Jay didn't really sing all his latest songs.
He sang mostly old songs and the audience was alittle too calm?
HAHA.
But Jay sings really well.
And I mean really really well.
He is so CUTE!!! :D

A very pretty garden near our hotel.

We went to the famous Fish Market!

:D
I'm a seafood lover and I totally loveee that place.
Needless to say, the guys went crazy!
They went crazy over the oysters, the abalones, the lobsters,
sashimi, basically everything!
If you are a seafood lover, this is a MUST GO place!
Its freaking cheapppp.
And everything is just so fresh.
Now I'm starting to miss the Fish Market.

Andrew brought us to a very nice Italian restaurant at The Rocks.
Real authentic Italian food.
Very nice, but the service there SUCKS.
The waiters are all those middle eastern people.
Not trying to be racist here but seriously!
HAHA.

And guess what?!
There is a Guylian Chocolate Cafe there!
Can you imagine how exciteddd I was?!
We went there for desserts after dinner.
Yummmmmy!



We saw this phone booth on the street and started playing with it.


Jee told me that Queen Victoria Mall is a place that I would definitely like it.
So we decided to go see for ourselves.
True enough,
I simply loveee the exterior & interior designs of it.
Very very nicely done.
Loving it!

On one of the nights, we took a leisure stroll after dinner.
We ended up just right opposite Sydney Opera House.
Awesome view!
We also took a pic of the Sdyney Opera House in the day.
Nice!

A very pretty church in the city caught my eye while we are shopping.
Can't take my eyes of that church!

And being the partyying us, we went clubbing at V Bar!
HAHAHAHA.
We club where ever we go man.
The club is very happening!
There were so many asians and the girls are super uber hot!
But! alittle too wild.
Well, the guys loveee it! HAHA.

Ohh! Did i mention that I HEART all the bakeries in Sdyney!
There were so many.
They all look so goodddd.
I wanted to try all but obviously I didn't manage to.
Saddddd!


Okayy, I think I have blogged quite abit of Sydney!
Gonna turn in soon.
Im going to my boss-Yohann's place for my farewell party tomorrow!
It's so nice of them to organise one for me.
Really appreciate that.
And graduation is on the 27th! This coming mondayyy.
So excittedd! :DDD
Will update soon.
That is if I'm not too lazy. HAHA.
Nitez! :)